|
Artist: Adam Sandler
Title: The Buffoon and the Valedictorian
Submit by: Annie
Date: 24/06/2003
Hits: 40
Performed by Adam Sandler and Jennifer Lien
";And now the buffoon's date at the drive-in with the school's valedictorian.";
Valedictorian: ";I really appreciate you're asking me out. Most people are intimidated by my high academic achievement.";
Buffoon: ";This movie sucks shit!";
Valedictorian: ";Well, Ebel gave it thumbs up, but Ciscel thought it was too preachy. Anyway, I enjoyed the director's last film immensly.";
Buffoon: ";Cathleen Turner has big fuckin' tits!";
Valedictorian: ";Yes, well, she recently had a child. I think her maternal biology may play a role in that. She looks fabulous for a woman her age, doesn't she?";
Buffoon: ";I put a firecracker in a bullfrog's mouth and blew his fuckin' head off.";
Valedictorian: ";Well, in psychology we learned that it is not uncommon for male adolescents to commit savage acts on animals as part of their maturing process.";
Buffoon: ";That girl in the fucking car in front of us, she gives everybody head.";
Valedictorian: ";Well, I guess she's strong for attention and she feels promiscuity is the only way to obtain it.";
[Buffoon eating popcorn]
Buffoon: ";This popcorn's fuckin' terrible. It tastes like someone jizzed all over it.";
[Buffoon continues to eat popcorn]
Valedictorian: ";Well the amount of semen on this popcorn is certainly disturbing. Perhaps the staff in the refreshment stand was overcome by the monotony of their work and decided to play a childish prank.";
Buffoon: ";I looked at my asshole in the mirror today. It blew my fuckin' mind!";
Valedictorian: ";It's ironic that parts of one's body seems odd and unusual because you don't see them on a day to day basis.
Buffoon: ";My father's shit stinks up the bathroom all fuckin' day!";
Valedictorian: ";It's puzzling why one person's fecal odor can be more overpowering than another's. I wonder whether it is a function of the food digested or that person's internal metabolism.";
Buffoon: ";I'm gonna go get head from that fuckin' girl.";
[Gets out of the car]
Valedictorian: ";Well, I'm sorry to see the date come to such an abrubt conclusion.";
[Buffoon walking away]
";I do appreciate the time you spent with me and look forward to a future rondevue.";
Buffoon: ";I like to piss in that guy's fuckin' gas tank!";
Valedictorian: ";Bye bye! Have fun.";
[Buffoon continues to walk away]
|
